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 Topic: The Psychological Effects of Leaving Islam

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  • Re: The Psychological Effects of Leaving Islam
     Reply #60 - October 11, 2009, 12:37 AM
    .
    You need to read this book.
  • Re: The Psychological Effects of Leaving Islam
     Reply #61 - October 21, 2009, 11:20 PM
    Leaving Islam cost me majority of my friends. I've yet to tell my parents because I do not know how to do it and the thought of doing it keeps me up some nights. When I speak with them they great me with Salam and I find myself responding in kind. I hate being 'deceptive'. I stay away from Muslims and getting involved in discussions regarding Islam because I am afraid of a negative backlash.
  • Re: The Psychological Effects of Leaving Islam
     Reply #62 - October 22, 2009, 01:10 AM
    but you have got James, and that is nice. I think the best thing one can have is an understanding partner or better still a one with the same position.
    ...
  • Re: The Psychological Effects of Leaving Islam
     Reply #63 - October 22, 2009, 02:56 AM
    Quote from: Omaar Khayaam on August 30, 2009, 11:07 PM
    I think the wifes head scarf and shalwar kameez gives it away dance


    Is she still a Muslim?
    "It's just a job. Grass grows, birds fly, waves pound the sand. I beat people up." - Muhammad Ali
  • Re: The Psychological Effects of Leaving Islam
     Reply #64 - October 22, 2009, 05:26 AM
    Quote from: kaiwai on October 22, 2009, 02:56 AM
    Is she still a Muslim?


    Yeah, she's a nominal muslim, only in name really. Never prays or fast.
  • Re: The Psychological Effects of Leaving Islam
     Reply #65 - October 22, 2009, 07:45 AM
    Quote from: Omaar Khayaam on October 22, 2009, 05:26 AM
    Yeah, she's a nominal muslim, only in name really. Never prays or fast.


    So it is more about maintaining links with the community more than anything else I guess?

    Sounds like my Christians I know. Attend the holy days of obligation to keep up appearances.
    "It's just a job. Grass grows, birds fly, waves pound the sand. I beat people up." - Muhammad Ali
  • Re: The Psychological Effects of Leaving Islam
     Reply #66 - October 22, 2009, 08:07 AM
    Quote from: kaiwai on October 22, 2009, 07:45 AM
    So it is more about maintaining links with the community more than anything else I guess?

    Sounds like my Christians I know. Attend the holy days of obligation to keep up appearances.


    Yeah, community and what people think really does matter to her. Firstly I'm a fairly introvert type of person and after my apostasy am really careful about who I make friends with and who I tell about my apostasy. I have learnt this the hard way unfortunately. If someone brings something up I don't like then I'll disagree with them and leave them something to think about.

    With my wife it's slightly different, for her it's the practical consequences of what my apostasy entails for her and for the circle of friends she keeps company with. The furthest she has expressed to her friends about my feelings is that I have doubts about Islam and never full blown apostasy. Her concern lies more in the realm of what people might say or wagging fingers, the worst extreme is having other kids make fun of our kids, which for me is a bigger concern than what she thinks, because she is an adult and can deal with it.
  • Re: The Psychological Effects of Leaving Islam
     Reply #67 - October 22, 2009, 11:33 AM
    Quote from: RIBS on October 22, 2009, 01:10 AM
    but you have got James, and that is nice. I think the best thing one can have is an understanding partner or better still a one with the same position.

    Yes, I am very fortunate in that regard Smiley It's rather amusing in an unamusing way that our situations with our respective families are totally the opposite. I was raised a Muslim and the worst thing for my parents would be me leaving Islam. James was raised by a Catholic mother who had already lost one son to Islam so the pain of knowing another had also converted would have been incomprehensible. Life eh?
  • Re: The Psychological Effects of Leaving Islam
     Reply #68 - October 22, 2009, 11:45 AM
    So who apostated first - you or James?  btw where is James these days?
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  • Re: The Psychological Effects of Leaving Islam
     Reply #69 - October 22, 2009, 11:53 AM
    He's getting down to some uni work for once Afro

    We had both been having doubts for a while but I think he was brave enough to admit it to himself before I was. When we first met he was very militant in his Islamic beliefs whilst I was more moderate- we didn't get on much. I was still 'observing' Islam when we did get together but he knew of my doubts and I his. So much has changed since then dance

  • Re: The Psychological Effects of Leaving Islam
     Reply #70 - October 22, 2009, 11:55 AM
    Good - make sure he doesnt get distracted, and pat his head for encouragement
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  • Re: The Psychological Effects of Leaving Islam
     Reply #71 - October 22, 2009, 01:44 PM
    Quote from: Ferrero on October 22, 2009, 11:53 AM
    He's getting down to some uni work for once Afro

    We had both been having doubts for a while but I think he was brave enough to admit it to himself before I was. When we first met he was very militant in his Islamic beliefs whilst I was more moderate- we didn't get on much. I was still 'observing' Islam when we did get together but he knew of my doubts and I his. So much has changed since then dance


    And if he wants to believe in God, there is always deism Smiley
    "It's just a job. Grass grows, birds fly, waves pound the sand. I beat people up." - Muhammad Ali
  • Re: The Psychological Effects of Leaving Islam
     Reply #72 - October 22, 2009, 04:10 PM
    Quote from: kaiwai on October 22, 2009, 01:44 PM
    And if he wants to believe in God, there is always deism Smiley

    Not really you cant assume there is a God just because you want there to be.

    I would like to think there is a God, but that does not make me a deist?  I would also like to think I will win the lottery next week, that does not mean it will happen.  Without anything to go off, I have to be honest with myself and accept agnostisicm.
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  • Re: The Psychological Effects of Leaving Islam
     Reply #73 - October 22, 2009, 04:17 PM
    Quote from: IsLame on October 22, 2009, 04:10 PM
    Not really you cant assume there is a God just because you want there to be.

    I would like to think there is a God, but that does not make me a deist?  I would also like to think I will win the lottery next week, that does not mean it will happen.  Without anything to go off, I have to be honest with myself and accept agnostisicm.


    So true, no matter how much one tries, wanting something to be true doesn't make it so.
  • Re: The Psychological Effects of Leaving Islam
     Reply #74 - October 23, 2009, 02:42 AM
    Quote from: Omaar Khayaam on October 22, 2009, 04:17 PM
    So true, no matter how much one tries, wanting something to be true doesn't make it so.


    But at the same time it needn't be a matter between choosing Islam or being an Atheist.
    "It's just a job. Grass grows, birds fly, waves pound the sand. I beat people up." - Muhammad Ali
  • Re: The Psychological Effects of Leaving Islam
     Reply #75 - October 23, 2009, 07:39 AM
    Quote from: kaiwai on October 23, 2009, 02:42 AM
    But at the same time it needn't be a matter between choosing Islam or being an Atheist.


    No it doesn't. The issue for me though was God himself. So no religion could ever satisfy that, no matter how complex the theology.
  • Re: The Psychological Effects of Leaving Islam
     Reply #76 - October 23, 2009, 07:58 AM
    See for me it was leaving Islam first, and then losing my faith in god....

  • Re: The Psychological Effects of Leaving Islam
     Reply #77 - October 23, 2009, 08:16 AM
    Quote from: kaiwai on October 23, 2009, 02:42 AM
    But at the same time it needn't be a matter between choosing Islam or being an Atheist.

    No, there are a myriad of different religions & ideologies, you can choose from them like a child in a sweeties shop (or even invent your own). The only difference is that your not out shopping selecting a preference - you are supposedly attempting to get to the truth.

    Unless you have any evidence we are not privy too, then you are really only left with 1 conclusion - and that is any mantra that acknowledges that God may not exist.  That deism isnt.
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  • Re: The Psychological Effects of Leaving Islam
     Reply #78 - November 11, 2009, 12:25 PM
    Quote from: IsLame on October 22, 2009, 11:55 AM
    Good - make sure he doesnt get distracted, and pat his head for encouragement

    This is not where you pat for encouragement.
    "Ask the slave girl; she will tell you the truth.' So the Apostle called Burayra to ask her. Ali got up and gave her a violent beating first, saying, 'Tell the Apostle the truth.'"
  • Re: The Psychological Effects of Leaving Islam
     Reply #79 - March 01, 2010, 01:15 AM


    I was heart broken when I first decided to leave Islam.  With no reason to exist and all my hopes and dreams crashing down around me it was extremely emotional. I remember crying like a baby for months afterwards..

    Then I kept coming back to the religion and giving it another chance although I didn't believe it would ever clarify my doubts.

    Now after leaving for the final time I am trying to get my life back. I have no support and Islam has messed with my self-esteem, confidence, and personal freedom.   I developled stockholm syndrome due to following the religion.

    I feel lucky to be in a non-muslim country where I have regained some independence despite being under constant threat. However, in the back of my mind I am still suspicious of sinning because of all the brainwashing. 

  • The Psychological Effects of Leaving Islam
     Reply #80 - April 14, 2014, 07:15 PM
    This says it all:

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7K6yjLdQZSo
    "I Knew who I was this morning, but I've changed a few times since then." Alice in wonderland

    "This is the only heaven we have how dare you make it a hell" Dr Marlene Winell
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