17 year old Ex Muslim
OP - March 12, 2016, 12:14 AM
Hey guys,
I'm glad to be here among like minded people. I've already (in the past few days) posted on some other forums and such, so I will use my same post from there (to give an introduction):
I'm a 17 year old living in Canada who has left Islam, and I became an 'agnostic atheist' as of now. I'm going to tell you guys my story in short below:
About 1 year ago, when I was 16, I began having doubts about Islam and these doubts kept building up to the point where I eventually decided to leave Islam. After leaving, I decided I was going to search for the true religion (whether it was Islam or anything else). After a lot more research, I came to the conclusion that there probably is no religion (all of them are man-made) or any God (at least not any God these religions portray); thus I became an 'agnostic atheist'. During this whole process, I trusted my sister, and I told her about me leaving Islam and I made her even promise that she won't tell anyone, especially my parents. However, she ended up breaking my trust and she told my parents. Soon it got to the point where my parents were literally ready to disown me. They kept threatening me that they'd kick me out of the house if I don't come back. And, they were not saying this to just threaten me so that I can come back- they were dead serious about it. So, out of fear of being kicked out of the house, I faked to come back. Now, I feel like complete shit, because I have to lie to my parents every single day. I have to lie to them about praying 5 times a day, etc, etc, etc. Every moment of my life I have to lie to them now. I also feel that I am using them for necessities of life (shelter, food, water, etc.) and for support (for university- which will start this September for me, as I am in Grade 12 right now). On one hand, I want to tell them because I don't want to deceive them any longer (with all these lies), and due to the guilt of 'using them' (for necessities of life and all the support). And, on the other hand, I don't want to tell them, because if I get disowned at the age of 17, my whole life will probably be over. I won't have anywhere to go. My entire family is Muslim, so none of them will help me, hence I'll be completely by myself and screwed.
In this situation, what should I do?
Thank you.
Topic: 17 year old Ex Muslim