Why do you need to call yourself Muslim? If you have a belief in god, take from whatever scripture that which intuitively feels right to you, and allow yourself a spiritual practise that makes you happy. Let happiness be your guide, not what Islam says you should do or feel.
Because I can't answer if questioning Islam was the 'right' thing at the beginning.
But then you are saying that Allah created you to abandon your senses? The reason we have isnad is because people question the Hadith. Not Sahih, kick it to the curb, right? Why would we bother with what is authentic and what is not proven if people were not supposed to question? Why would we have Tafsir? Tafsir is to clarify what people are questioning in Quran. Why would you choose to believe one scholar over your neighbor? Because that scholar researched for years on some issue and then clarified it for you. Your neighbor is guessing, and since his niyyat is good, it is acceptable. But for real, everyone knows you need the scholar more than the neighbor, because people question your neighbor's pronouncements. The entire tradition is built on questioning. Islam begs questioning, and it obliges with answers from every direction. Just pick one. But don't stop the questioning.
Islam encourages questioning to the extent that it is not against it and only to discover the hidden wisdoms of its message. It never says "look for other religions, you'll discover at the end that Islam is true". That seems like a trap, so designed that I would expect from a sadist God. (sadist in this world)
For me it seems like that would be the equivalent of following Catholic Church tradition as a Christian.
For muslims you should question your religion, so that you should become a muslim. But while becoming muslim, you should not, in other words, the only questioning must happen against roman catholicism but not while accepting Islam.
What's so special about a homophobic God?
It's that it was the God i was raised to believe in for almost 20 years, the one (imaginary or not) that causes my anxiety and tells me to do whatever he wants.
Topic: I reconvert