I'm not a parent, but its about parenting.
Though it might be strange I have always been slightly grateful for the neglect I experienced as a teenager, and today was even more so. Why you ask?
Well what I have discovered about my half brother and sisters upbringing, has got me being thankful I didn't live with my stepmother. My half siblings have always been quite childish for their age, and I always found it strange, that when I was the same age I was very different. I was aware that my little brother was fed by my dad otherwise he won't eat, up until the age of 12, I thought the reason was because he was always distracted by his gaming consoles, but no, its because that's how his mum feeds him at home and he actually wouldn't get round to doing it if he wasn't fed. He's now 13 and my half sister is 16 they aren't allowed to walk to school themselves, they aren't allowed to go to the shops themselves, and not allowed a key etc. My dad would sneakily let my brother do these things himself when he comes to visit on the weekend to try and teach him to grow up, but my sister doesn't usually come. So I thought ok, a little overbearing, but then the extremely creepy part... they both have to be monitored in the shower by their mother, yes the 13 year old AND the 16 year old. Their babyish behaviour now makes sense, but i'm rather creeped out about the lack of privacy. My ex stepmother uses the 16 year old girl almost like those parents that try to live through their children, she has thick hair so she makes her keep it long, she takes care of her hair for her and won't let her do anything to it herself, to the point where she washes it for her in the shower. Like WTF! By that age, if you want long hair, learn to take care of it yourself, you're fucking 16!! I know that south Asian parents can be a bit overbearing, but is this normal? Am I just judging this by my own western perceptions?
That is insanity. My children are very small, and I make it a point to have them wait, to tell them I cannot help them, and etc. So they can figure it out for themselves and gain a little pride with their self sufficiency. I have a tendency to do too much for them, so I am vigilant.
Your siblings are being abused, their personal growth sadly neglected. I am very, very sorry for them.