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Theme Changer

 Poll

  • Question: How many when leaving the faith had depression set in
  • No
  • Yes
  • Yes with suicidal thoughts
  • Yes with suicidal tendencies
  • Yes with actually attempting

 Topic: Depression and suicide

 (Read 37407 times)
  • Previous page 1 2 3 45 Next page « Previous thread | Next thread »
  • Depression and suicide
     Reply #90 - April 13, 2013, 04:04 AM

    So life's been fun lately. Dropped all my classes on the recommendation of my computer science advisor since the whole being suicidal thing is supposedly bad to warrant my focus. I'm also not returning to university in the summer (maybe will in the fall), and I'm currently getting all the doctors notes together to remove my failures and withdrawals from my academic report as well as getting my residence deposit for next term back.

    Also kind of annoying is ProxTube stopped working so now I can't watch that video in my watch later list on how to make and use an exit bag...
  • Depression and suicide
     Reply #91 - April 13, 2013, 04:20 AM

    ^ That's great Sethyboy. I'm glad to hear things are looking up and taking a break from school to get back on your feet is a good idea. I hope it all works out  Afro
  • Depression and suicide
     Reply #92 - April 14, 2013, 11:54 PM

    Been feeling down lately, wouldn't say it's depression again though, but meh. Lack of certainty about the future is a huge reason for this. My worst nightmare was 'failing to launch at life'  and by life meaning having a career and standing independent, but I'm bordering on falling back completely currently. Knowing my parents will be on my back about marriage within the year doesn't help either -that's going to be a big shitstorm.

    "Between stimulus and response there is a space. In that space is our power to choose our response. In our response lies our growth and our freedom." - Viktor E. Frankl

    'Life is just the extreme expression of complex chemistry' - Neil deGrasse Tyson
  • Depression and suicide
     Reply #93 - April 15, 2013, 12:04 AM

    This thread is no place for you, dusty. Life will have it's ups and downs, good times and bad. It always will. You've already done so much, and I'm sure you'll continue to do so much more. Fuck marriage. Do you. Failure is only a state of mind.
  • Depression and suicide
     Reply #94 - April 15, 2013, 01:46 AM

    Yeah, I know what depression is like (least for me) I've been there. I'm not there currently, but on the edge.

    Failure isn't a state of mind though, there are fixed objectives/systems you're working in to compare to.

    "Between stimulus and response there is a space. In that space is our power to choose our response. In our response lies our growth and our freedom." - Viktor E. Frankl

    'Life is just the extreme expression of complex chemistry' - Neil deGrasse Tyson
  • Depression and suicide
     Reply #95 - April 15, 2013, 01:49 AM

    So life's been fun lately. Dropped all my classes on the recommendation of my computer science advisor since the whole being suicidal thing is supposedly bad to warrant my focus. I'm also not returning to university in the summer (maybe will in the fall), and I'm currently getting all the doctors notes together to remove my failures and withdrawals from my academic report as well as getting my residence deposit for next term back.

    Also kind of annoying is ProxTube stopped working so now I can't watch that video in my watch later list on how to make and use an exit bag...

     

    So are your officially dropping out of university or just dropping classes ? 

    In my opinion a life without curiosity is not a life worth living
  • Depression and suicide
     Reply #96 - April 15, 2013, 09:38 AM

    Thought about it but then started to doubt islam and stopped fearing hell, made peace with who I am and decided life was worth living.

    That's what gets me about folks who convert, I wonder how bad their lives have to be to convert to Islam.


    Oh my Christopher Hitchens its a fihrrrrrrrrrrrr
  • Depression and suicide
     Reply #97 - April 15, 2013, 07:13 PM

    ^ I don't think the reason people convert to Islam is because of bad lives. More than often, I think that the initial interest in the religion is sparked by seeing evil in the world, even if the evil does not directly affect them. Then, that interest leads to investigation, which leads to "strong" reasons for believing that Islam is true.
  • Depression and suicide
     Reply #98 - April 18, 2013, 05:21 AM



    So are your officially dropping out of university or just dropping classes ? 


    Dropped classes and not coming back for spring term. I'd like to shoot for a fall term return, but for that to happen I have to be better and alive by then, which I can't be sure of at this point.
  • Depression and suicide
     Reply #99 - June 02, 2013, 07:36 PM

    In general when I'm alone I'm fine, when I'm among certain relatives that's when I feel awful. I leave the room with all these morbid thoughts about myself.

    Again It's hard to live a happy life when the people who are causing you stress is your immediate family.

    "In every religion there is love, yet love has no religion"

    "The intellectual runs away, afraid of drowning; the whole business of love is to drown in the sea." - Rumi
  • Depression and suicide
     Reply #100 - June 02, 2013, 08:52 PM

    Same with me. When i'm alone or outdoors, I feel free. But when i'm around family, I always feel a huge amount of stress, as if something is stuck in my chest.

    The irony is that the people who most would consider your closest friends are in fact your family. But its your family who often act and treat you the complete opposite of 'friends'.
  • Depression and suicide
     Reply #101 - June 03, 2013, 12:52 AM

    Again It's hard to live a happy life when the people who are causing you stress is your immediate family.


    As Shakespeare would've said, a little more than kin and less than kind. I know that feeling very well. A day with my father never fails to give me a powerful dose of melancholy. There we have irony messing with us again, when we in our human culture think of biological relationships as a synonym for a happy one. Well no it's not, and I've had happier moments in a palaver with strangers than I've had with that immature, fanatic, weak chinned scumbag of a father.

    Believe those who are seeking the truth. Doubt those who find it.
  • Depression and suicide
     Reply #102 - June 04, 2013, 09:43 AM

    Its true the saying 'You can't pick your family but you can pick your friends'. Most parents want to be close to their children but deny the children the freedoms not only outside of the house but also in face to face arguments with them. This lack of freedom means that people in the household cannot know each other and also therefore cannot sympathise and empathise with one another helping people through issues they may be having.
  • Depression and suicide
     Reply #103 - June 04, 2013, 08:38 PM

    My life-long depression lifted after leaving Islam. There are still traces of depression and low self-esteem, but it's healing.

    I offer a listening ear to anyone in need.
  • Depression and suicide
     Reply #104 - June 04, 2013, 09:54 PM

    Been depressed and suicidal for 2-3 months. To realise that what id thought was true may well be not, not being able to share this with close friends.  Second guessing myself, the nagging feeling of it possibly being true. Having an existential crisis in my mid 20s going from a gregarious larger than life character to a recluse in 6 months. A constant battle between rationality and irrational thoughts. Work suffering, low self esteem. Worst thing is my family wont understand.  Its not their fault. Sometimes I think this is Allahs way of punishing me then I think of all the evidence stacked against religion.  Im worried about the future.  Im gonna have to live life in the closet. But I could be liable to flip into religious mode. Wtf has happened to me? Ive lost interest in things,  football mainly. Just feel ive fucked myself up by asking way too many questions.

    Don't read all those science books bro, you'll just get more confused.

    That's funny. The more science I read, the less confused I get.
  • Depression and suicide
     Reply #105 - June 04, 2013, 10:08 PM

    I have been exactly where you were. I know what you mean. I wouldn’t say that I was suicidal in the sense that I want to kill myself. I was just very apathetic towards the idea of living. If I knew that I was about to die, I would just be like “Meh.”

    I’m not sure that the stress we ex-Muslims face is ever really appreciated. While it can be very liberating, you also have lost a huge part of your identity, often times, the core of your identity—your reason for being.

    Couple with that the threat or the actual occurrence of losing your natural relationships, your friends, your social circles, and your mate—as was the case with me—and you are put under an unbelievable amount of stress. People mourn for years at the loss of loved ones. We may lose our loved ones in an instant, after a slip of the tongue in a conversation or an uncleared internet history, and we just have to suck it all up.

    It’s tough dude. I know first hand.

    But know two things: Firstly, you are not being punished by a god. The pressures that you are under are completely and entirely the work of human beings who are acting in accordance with the cult-like mind parasite that is Islam. None of the stress that we are under makes the existence of god any more true or any more believable. No other change of mind would require so much stress. It is more a testament to the weakness of the argument than its strength that it requires wives to hate husbands and fathers to disown sons.

    Secondly, know for a fact that you are not alone. In addition to the billions of people every day who wake up and go to sleep, going about their lives without the slightest concern that Islam might be true (it’s not), there is also us. There are countless ex-Muslims out there who know exactly what you are going through. We offer each other support, we help each other learn and grow and laugh and smile again, and we carry on together.

    I hope it can be appreciated just how important that is.
  • Depression and suicide
     Reply #106 - June 04, 2013, 10:18 PM

    My dad thinks this is a phase. I beat myself up over the fact that a girl who loved me got pushed away. Ive been a dick to my parents too. Just feel angry and trapped. Bound to culture.  I dont know myself. 

    Don't read all those science books bro, you'll just get more confused.

    That's funny. The more science I read, the less confused I get.
  • Depression and suicide
     Reply #107 - June 04, 2013, 10:28 PM

    Take some time to breathe and find yourself bro. We all need that. It's not a phase. Sure your relationship might have sparked your curiosity into the world outside of Islam, but you can't make yourself un-know something once you know it.

    I promise it does get better as you become more comfortable with who you are. I went through the same thing.  When I first told my wife I didn't believe that Muhammad was a messenger of God any more, my life became a hell. I tried hard to consider if I had made the wrong move or if I had just overlooked something that I should have noticed in Islam, but that phase of discovery made me even more certain of my conclusions. Everything about it did that.

    So I wish you all the best bro, I really do. I know exactly where you are and I know there will be ups and downs. Don't let the downs be longer than the ups.
    .
  • Depression and suicide
     Reply #108 - June 04, 2013, 10:34 PM

    Its having to deal with the fact I was the happiest id ever been until mid jan. Then I turned religious overnightand had to change my worldview. Doubts started to creep in a month later but you cant go back. My family saw the sudden change and were happy. Now they think this is an emotional response to the girl. I suppose it is but I think I needed it. I remember as I first started becoming religious I felt I was getting brainwashed.

    Don't read all those science books bro, you'll just get more confused.

    That's funny. The more science I read, the less confused I get.
  • Depression and suicide
     Reply #109 - April 04, 2014, 09:58 PM

    I was happy when I left Islam. Euphoric.
  • Depression and suicide
     Reply #110 - April 04, 2014, 10:06 PM

    I was happy when I left Islam. Euphoric.


    Islam or No Islam., I wish you the same happiness all the way until you turn 90 year old lady INcePtion..

    So work for it....

    with best wishes
    yeezevee

    Do not let silence become your legacy.. Question everything   
    I renounced my faith to become a kafir, 
    the beloved betrayed me and turned in to  a Muslim
     
  • Depression and suicide
     Reply #111 - April 04, 2014, 10:09 PM

    Lol yeez  I dont want to live that longer.  Cheesy

    But thanks  Uncle Yeezevee
  • Depression and suicide
     Reply #112 - April 04, 2014, 10:10 PM

    Lol yeez  I dont want to live that longer.  Cheesy

    You're not 89 yet. Wink

    Devious, treacherous, murderous, neanderthal, sub-human of the West. bunny
  • Depression and suicide
     Reply #113 - April 13, 2014, 11:27 PM

    Shit. I was a right whiney twat. Reading this back makes me quite happy. What a difference ten months makes

    Don't read all those science books bro, you'll just get more confused.

    That's funny. The more science I read, the less confused I get.
  • Depression and suicide
     Reply #114 - April 13, 2014, 11:55 PM

    I remember when I was Chucked out age 16 sleeping in a train shelter for 2 days before my friend took me in, that I constantly thought of walking down the tracks and let the train hit me and kill me, my rational mind saved me.

    Can anyone provide me with a decent challenge?
  • Depression and suicide
     Reply #115 - April 29, 2014, 02:35 AM

    ..
  • Depression and suicide
     Reply #116 - April 29, 2014, 02:55 AM

    Still waiting for therapy. Antidepressants haven't caused my suicidal thoughts and plans to abate. Additionally, certain members of my family think that my depression is a cover up for my drinking.

    I've come to the conclusion that (true) depression is seen as haram, shameful or defective within the purview of orthodox Islam. Don't get me wrong, it's completely acceptable to be sad, but hopelessness or lack of vitality is seen as contradicting the maxims that Allah has made incumbent upon us. One could even contend that it is a form of minor shirk.

    I've failed university, I have no way of becoming financially independent, and as soon as I return back home next month I'm going to be put on another waiting list which is going to mean that I probably won't get any therapy until at least September or October. Love the NHS!


    This is the disease talking, pure and simple. Having experienced a similar situation and felt these exact same thoughts, I can tell you that situations are never as bleak as the depression tells you it is. Right now I'm pursuing exactly those same goals which I thought were unattainable when depressed, and my circumstances haven't changed in any meaningful way other than the depression.

    I know its not much solace psychologically, but try to remember that from a factual point of view that you are being lied to. There are paths for you, and you'll be able to see them better when you're feeling better. Best wishes and hugs mate!  far away hug

    how fuck works without shit??


    Let's Play Chess!

    harakaat, friend, RIP
  • Depression and suicide
     Reply #117 - April 29, 2014, 03:03 AM

    I am so sorry. That is a long and awful wait. Is there not some way to speed up the process, by claiming suicidal thoughts? That gets results, over here. Antidepressants did not work for me, either. I know what that is like. Age helped me a lot, work even more.



    Education is good, rounding, etc.. but it is not the only road to money. Go back to university for the experience if you can, but don't see it as a key to living life and earning income. You are a smart kid, I don't see you being stopped easily, by anything.


    Don't let Hitler have the street.
  • Depression and suicide
     Reply #118 - April 29, 2014, 03:14 AM

    This is the disease talking, pure and simple. Having experienced a similar situation and felt these exact same thoughts, I can tell you that situations are never as bleak as the depression tells you it is. Right now I'm pursuing exactly those same goals which I thought were unattainable when depressed, and my circumstances haven't changed in any meaningful way other than the depression.

    I know its not much solace psychologically, but try to remember that from a factual point of view that you are being lied to. There are paths for you, and you'll be able to see them better when you're feeling better. Best wishes and hugs mate!  far away hug


    I can assure you that this isn't mere maudlin thoughts talking as a result of a disease. The doctors have explicitly informed me that they refuse to change my meds until two years have elapsed.

    Given that when I go back home I'm going to be told ad nauseum that my feelings and impulses are a result of deficient iman, I don't see how on earth I'll be able to recover.

    I always ask muslim associates: give me one, just one (logically coherent) answer to my doubts and I'll believe again. I'll try and rationalise away everything I can. I'll even become fucking quran-only, for heaven's sake!
  • Depression and suicide
     Reply #119 - April 29, 2014, 03:42 AM

    I am so very sorry. I never heard of keeping meds the same when they are not working. That is criminal.
    I hope you can get new doctors.

    Don't let Hitler have the street.
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