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Theme Changer

 Topic: Shit Muslims Say To Ex-Muslims

 (Read 173273 times)
  • Previous page 1 ... 12 13 1415 16 ... 25 Next page « Previous thread | Next thread »
  • Shit Muslims Say To Ex-Muslims
     Reply #390 - May 21, 2014, 10:10 AM

    Where is that pearl of wisdom from?


    My ex  Cry

    "The healthiest people I know are those who are the first to label themselves fucked up." - three
  • Shit Muslims Say To Ex-Muslims
     Reply #391 - May 21, 2014, 10:11 AM

    Gross
  • Shit Muslims Say To Ex-Muslims
     Reply #392 - May 21, 2014, 10:28 AM

    I know, he is a treasure box of quotes like that

    "The healthiest people I know are those who are the first to label themselves fucked up." - three
  • Shit Muslims Say To Ex-Muslims
     Reply #393 - May 21, 2014, 04:15 PM

    The only Jewish people I know are strong, strong critics of Islam. I remember a dear friend of mine, who is a Jewish man in his 40's, once asked me regarding my conversion, "What was it you liked about Islam? Was it the slavery?" And of course I gave him a ton of apologist nonsense, and I still remember him relenting with a smug, knowing smile that I will never forget. Grin

    Odd that he would be critical and judgmental considering he comes from a religion/ethnicity that boasts of its status as slave people.
  • Shit Muslims Say To Ex-Muslims
     Reply #394 - May 21, 2014, 04:35 PM

    ^Lol, but they celebrate their liberation from slavery and were unhappy as slaves (I'm pretty sure this never even happened in reality). It'd make sense for former slaves to dislike slavery.
  • Shit Muslims Say To Ex-Muslims
     Reply #395 - May 25, 2014, 04:52 AM

    This guy at work before he knew I was an ex muslim used to just say a regular hello, after finding out he seems to on purpose say AsalaamuAleikum now.  Cheesy  I just laughed at him and said hello.   Passive aggressive nonsense but it helps make the hours go by

    Oh my Christopher Hitchens its a fihrrrrrrrrrrrr
  • Shit Muslims Say To Ex-Muslims
     Reply #396 - May 25, 2014, 05:18 AM

    I find it hilrarious how a muslim isnt supposed to reply walaikumasalam to a non muslim, only walaikum.. In my tragic muslim ignorant days i would sometimes omit salaam to non muslims who greeted me..  how awful..  wacko
  • Shit Muslims Say To Ex-Muslims
     Reply #397 - May 27, 2014, 07:28 AM

    You've got to remain a muslim bro because you've been circumcised.

    My mind runs, I can never catch it even if I get a head start.
  • Shit Muslims Say To Ex-Muslims
     Reply #398 - May 27, 2014, 08:53 AM

    ^
    LOL Cheesy
  • Shit Muslims Say To Ex-Muslims
     Reply #399 - May 27, 2014, 09:00 AM

    You've got to remain a muslim bro because you've been circumcised.

     

    Or you can convert to Judaism.

    In my opinion a life without curiosity is not a life worth living
  • Shit Muslims Say To Ex-Muslims
     Reply #400 - May 27, 2014, 09:03 AM

    Or American in certain parts.

    how fuck works without shit??


    Let's Play Chess!

    harakaat, friend, RIP
  • Shit Muslims Say To Ex-Muslims
     Reply #401 - May 27, 2014, 09:34 AM

    Lol

    My mind runs, I can never catch it even if I get a head start.
  • Shit Muslims Say To Ex-Muslims
     Reply #402 - May 27, 2014, 11:55 AM

    If you have left Islam, why don't you change your name? This name is a Muslim name, you can't keep it! Change it. NOW.

    "Blessed are they who can laugh at themselves, for they shall never cease to be amused."
  • Shit Muslims Say To Ex-Muslims
     Reply #403 - May 30, 2014, 03:30 PM

    If you have left Islam, why don't you change your name? This name is a Muslim name, you can't keep it! Change it. NOW.


    OK. I change my name to: “Allah Muhammad-Smacker”.

    Tongue
  • Shit Muslims Say To Ex-Muslims
     Reply #404 - June 15, 2014, 07:52 AM

    This thread. *Manic laughter*  Cheesy

    My nan when my cousin came out:

    "No! You don't know what you're saying...This is jadoo. Somebody did black magic on you! I'm calling the Pir to sort this out."

    Education is not the filling of a pail, but the lighting of a fire.
  • Shit Muslims Say To Ex-Muslims
     Reply #405 - June 15, 2014, 09:10 AM

    How about this?
    (A friend of mine sent this to me, he's evidently a Muslim)

    "I will leave with a quick note, if you ever want islam there is 1 scientific experience which you can touch see and feel, not philosophize such as things like intelligent design, which pretty much seals the deal and proves it to any sensible mind. I have never mentioned it even in my life story, I know it, but if you ever do want islam (probably not) go out in the real world and you just might find it. I wont give it away And its nothing philosophical whatsoever like first cause, chance etc. I can't tell you but as a muslim i'll say wallahi there is something.  its not even something like "The quran makes water crystalize" or some weird thing dawah man said, or consciousness or anything like that this is legit something world view changing, In your eyes I may have lost my legitimacy but trust me when I say this, maybe one day you'll experience, see, touch, and interact with what i'm talking about, and on that day you may know this is what I said. its purely physical and not something like reading the quran, and its not the night I saw leylat al qadr or something like that .


    I've left hints, its something you SEE, HEAR, OBSERVE, and such. I'm saying its not like the night I saw that because thats a personal experience and not something accessible to others, but what im talking about definitely is without a shadow of a doubt, and in the evilest. It's definitely not seeing a tree or something like that and saying "yea islam is true"...I think I may already have gave too many hints. "yea bro I felt the wind, islam must be true its scientific" LOL, definitely not like that. I will now be on my way.

    Some of the evilest of people can SHOW you.* I do apologize by doing this plz don't hate me. Peace
    some people just need a real world experience, this is probably the only one"


    This was the last convo me and him had about Islam :W



    I laughed so hard at this. Maybe he's talking about mind-blowing sex and the best orgasm he's ever had.

    The future is full of thrilling possibilities.
  • Shit Muslims Say To Ex-Muslims
     Reply #406 - June 15, 2014, 09:36 AM

    This thread. *Manic laughter*  Cheesy

    My nan when my cousin came out:

    "No! You don't know what you're saying...This is jadoo. Somebody did black magic on you! I'm calling the Pir to sort this out."


    Pir baba can sort it out.

    Or maybe it's one of your family members that wants to dishonour you has done some black magic on you. That makes sense.

    No free mixing of the sexes is permitted on these forums or via PM or the various chat groups that are operating.

    Women must write modestly and all men must lower their case.

    http://www.ummah.com/forum/showthread.php?425649-Have-some-Hayaa-%28modesty-shame%29-people!
  • Shit Muslims Say To Ex-Muslims
     Reply #407 - June 15, 2014, 09:54 AM

    Pir baba can sort anything out for a small fee *cough-£50-cough*  whistling2
    Charged about £30, locked me in a dark room [when i was 7-ish] and viola I was no longer afraid of the dark.... except I was.  wacko

    Education is not the filling of a pail, but the lighting of a fire.
  • Shit Muslims Say To Ex-Muslims
     Reply #408 - June 15, 2014, 10:01 AM

    This crazy girl I was dating told me how a pir baba once offered to cure her anxiety by having sex with her. Stupid cow even considered it. I asked her about it and she didn't seem shocked by it at all. She thoguht she'd been possessed by a Djinn.

    No free mixing of the sexes is permitted on these forums or via PM or the various chat groups that are operating.

    Women must write modestly and all men must lower their case.

    http://www.ummah.com/forum/showthread.php?425649-Have-some-Hayaa-%28modesty-shame%29-people!
  • Shit Muslims Say To Ex-Muslims
     Reply #409 - June 15, 2014, 10:06 AM

     Cheesy
    What a banana.
    Lmao, I'd love to have seen how that convo went down.
    "Basically beti....I have to fuck the jinn to get it out of you."  yes

    Education is not the filling of a pail, but the lighting of a fire.
  • Shit Muslims Say To Ex-Muslims
     Reply #410 - June 15, 2014, 10:26 AM

    Now there's a reason to convert to islam. Christians, when your god comes back and starts turning water into wine, call me.

    `But I don't want to go among mad people,' Alice remarked.
     `Oh, you can't help that,' said the Cat: `we're all mad here. I'm mad.  You're mad.'
     `How do you know I'm mad?' said Alice.
     `You must be,' said the Cat, `or you wouldn't have come here.'
  • Shit Muslims Say To Ex-Muslims
     Reply #411 - June 15, 2014, 10:41 AM

    Cheesy
    What a banana.
    Lmao, I'd love to have seen how that convo went down.
    "Basically beti....I have to fuck the jinn to get it out of you."  yes


    Scary thing is...I don't think she saw anything wrong with it. Not deep down WTF bat shit crazy wrong, though that's what it was.

    He told her that she might be possessed by a Djinn that was giving her negative thougths as her heart was imure by living in a western environemnt and therefore the Djinn needed to be coerced out of her. She needed to be purified by his Pir danda apparently.

    Oh an Quod I better not see the following advert:

    Got marital problems? Anxiety issues? Performance related stress?

    Then don't delay call on the services off...

    PIR BABA QUOD!

    He will purify your body and soul with his special holy water!

    Anonymity and confidentiality guaranteed

    May result in pregnancy.

    No free mixing of the sexes is permitted on these forums or via PM or the various chat groups that are operating.

    Women must write modestly and all men must lower their case.

    http://www.ummah.com/forum/showthread.php?425649-Have-some-Hayaa-%28modesty-shame%29-people!
  • Shit Muslims Say To Ex-Muslims
     Reply #412 - June 15, 2014, 10:59 AM

    Quote
    May result in pregnancy.

     

    I can't think of anything more embarrassing than having to tell people that you got pregnant by a Pir baba.


    And @Jedi ?    How the hell did you end up on a date with her ?

    I would just troll and say that my semen has been blessed by a saint and anyone that gives me a blowjob and drinks it will have good fortune for five months  Grin 


    In my opinion a life without curiosity is not a life worth living
  • Shit Muslims Say To Ex-Muslims
     Reply #413 - June 15, 2014, 11:07 AM

    ^^^^^^

    It was an asian dating site. Some of the most craziest experiences I've had are from there.

    No free mixing of the sexes is permitted on these forums or via PM or the various chat groups that are operating.

    Women must write modestly and all men must lower their case.

    http://www.ummah.com/forum/showthread.php?425649-Have-some-Hayaa-%28modesty-shame%29-people!
  • Shit Muslims Say To Ex-Muslims
     Reply #414 - June 15, 2014, 11:10 AM

    ^

     Cheesy  What are you doing on a desi dating site ?

    If your in your twenties go with OkCupid and tinder.    If your 30 and older choose something like eHarmony or Match. 


    In my opinion a life without curiosity is not a life worth living
  • Shit Muslims Say To Ex-Muslims
     Reply #415 - June 15, 2014, 11:11 AM

    ^^^^^^

    It was an asian dating site. Some of the most craziest experiences I've had are from there.

    Shaadi.com  Cheesy

    "Dont you want to get married and live a happy life?"

    Noooooooooo



  • Shit Muslims Say To Ex-Muslims
     Reply #416 - June 15, 2014, 11:12 AM

     Cheesy Cheesy Cheesy Cheesy

    Singlemuslim?!

    Education is not the filling of a pail, but the lighting of a fire.
  • Shit Muslims Say To Ex-Muslims
     Reply #417 - June 15, 2014, 11:23 AM

    ^^^^^^^^^^


    Because I thought not everyone was/is loopy about religion. Seriously there was this girl I was talking to and I had just come out of the shower and when I told her I couldn't talk because I was about to get dressed she'd asked for a picture! On her profile she said 'I really want to find out more about my deen'. Never called her back.

    Most of the girls you come across say they want to learn more about their deen and increase thier imaan. Seriously, you go on a dating site to find someone so that you can learn more about Islam? Buy yourself a fucking library card!

    There were too many pretentious Muslims out there.

    Lol, one girl I was dating, and she was a doctor too, refused to talk about anything supernatural because 'I've got first hand experience of that sort of thing' and the look she gave me was scary. She also drank and partied, but when I told her about the issue of apostasy she said 'but what answer are you going to give to Allah when you die'!?

    Another girl, well she couldn't stop talking about Islam. She thought she figured out the correct, true version of Islam and all she would talk about is 'did you know Islam really says this...?' and it went on for a couple of hours. I was just glad that she rang me rather than the other way around.

    Then there was this other girl who said that she loved going on holidays and scuba diving and how she wanted to be a scuba diving instructor and loved going to Egypt to get lessons. She asked me if I prayed and I said no and she said she wanted a husband to pray with her as she prays 5 times a day and observes Islam because that will make me a better person.  I asked her 'how are you going to observe Islam by wearing tight scuba diving gear in front of ghair mahram?' She screamed at me and I told her to get her head checked out. Really, some of those girls are bat shit crazy delusional.

    No free mixing of the sexes is permitted on these forums or via PM or the various chat groups that are operating.

    Women must write modestly and all men must lower their case.

    http://www.ummah.com/forum/showthread.php?425649-Have-some-Hayaa-%28modesty-shame%29-people!
  • Shit Muslims Say To Ex-Muslims
     Reply #418 - June 15, 2014, 11:45 AM

    man those are some crazy dates.     wacko 

    lol to save yourself the trouble just use the dating sites I mentioned in my previous posts.  That way you will be more likely to find some quality people.




    In my opinion a life without curiosity is not a life worth living
  • Shit Muslims Say To Ex-Muslims
     Reply #419 - June 15, 2014, 11:53 AM

    Normal ones to.

    `But I don't want to go among mad people,' Alice remarked.
     `Oh, you can't help that,' said the Cat: `we're all mad here. I'm mad.  You're mad.'
     `How do you know I'm mad?' said Alice.
     `You must be,' said the Cat, `or you wouldn't have come here.'
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