So, I've been thinking for some time about doing an art exhibition based on my life as a muslim prior to my deconversion and also on the subject of escape and apostasy based on my experience.
I'd do it under an assumed name (not the one I have now) and wouldn't attend the opening due to security reasons. For those who want to know, I'm an artist and I paint people's walls (murals) for extra income and quite frequently do commissions for people. I use various mediums, such as paint, drawing, sculpturing, embroidery, sewing, collages, wood and soap carving, relief work, and lithography. My art is usually very raw and people have said many times that my work is very emotion producing and gets the point across very well, most people tell me that they can feel what I feel when I'm creating it and I've seen people look like they are going to cry when they first see some of my artwork. Obviously when I paint for other people I paint what they want, and I usually have happy music blasting when I paint for other people so that happy-feelings will come out in the resulting product.
Obviously it would be very controversial and would create a lot of public debate, but it's something that I really want to do. Any ideas on how to go about it? Would it be considered too inappropriate by the public in terms of being shot-down and legal problems? Like I know it would be very politically incorrect and I'm a little worried about having a discrimination law suit being slapped on me... I don't know how far one can push it in the art world. I've seen only one thing close to what I'm wanting to do in terms of art, and that was a chocolate mold in an art exhibition I went to done of a suicide bomber's body after they'd blown themselves up. Also, what's the chances of having my work vandalized or a Muslim backlash? What's the chance of having a reaction like the Denmark Muhammad cartoon thing, or like the subsequent events after Ayaan Hirsi's/Theo Van Gogh's
Submission was released?
If I do it, I won't be holding back, I want to adress every ugly, disgusting, horrifying, abusive etc... aspect of my life prior to leaving Islam and also want to adress my escape and journey after leaving through art (paintings, sculpture etc...). Also want to have such things that show the more banal parts of the existance I led, such as washing one's bum when using the toilet, daily boredom at having to stay at home all day every day because my X wouldn't let me go any where. Also the nicer aspects such as sneaking watching tv when my X wasn't there, Eid, attending weddings and so on. I want it to be a statement of what life can be like (what my life was like) when living in the extremist community and what it can be like being married to an extremist Muslim and what it can be like trying to get out and the fear you're left with. I won't tip-toe around things, not going to pander to political correctness, it's about expression not about keeping the public happy in their little bubble.
I've already done for it:
- A painting of my miscarriage from when my X booted me repeatedly in my stomach.
- A salaat mat I've woven and embroidered according to traditional methods modified for the purpose of doing the images I wanted to embroider (I researched for the methods used traditionally by the women in my X's country) of niqabis in different aspects of public life, such as walking behind husband, carrying child, eating with niqab on, praying (without niqab), being slapped by husband in public in front of the shabab (who sit in front of the coffee shop), reading Qu'ran in mosque, and hugging a friend.
- A black and white painting of two women (representing me) back to back, both looking at the sky, one a niqabi in a room that is dark (I wasn't allowed to open the curtains or blinds as my X was convinced that some man might see me, so it was always dark in my home) and the other in singlet and shorts with a light background/open curtains behind her.
A colour painting of a niqabi in shariah class with the sheikh at the front talking and all the other niqabi's around her with her open Join the Caravan open on the desk in front of her and the others in various poses, mostly reading/taking notes.
I'm working on ideas for more and have a few others that I've started but haven't completed. I want to do a full-life-size sculpture of a woman being bashed by a man, representing me and my X... not sure what to use for that or what other details surrounding to put in.
The problem for me with doing this as an exhibition is I only know one other artist who has retired from the art world for 10+ years. He supports me in this, but I'm not sure what problems I will come up against with it. I wouldn't do it for a couple of years yet, as I only work on these pieces when I'm in the mood, particularly when I'm having flashbacks or sad because of what I went through or angry, or rarely when frustrated 'cause find I sometimes find I revert to prior Islamic behavior/thoughts. I channel those feelings into the artwork, therapeutic for me. Kind of a little scared what the public reaction would be if I do do this as an exhibition. Sometimes I think I must be stupid for even thinking of doing this. Am I crazy for thinking of doing this? Idk. Will the world ever be ready for it?
Any ideas, thoughts, opinions, criticisms?
Topic: Art exhibition on life as Muslim