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Theme Changer

 Poll

  • Question: Same as above
  • Yes - brutally and often - 5 (4.6%)
  • Yes - brutally but not often only when they really flipped out - 10 (9.3%)
  • Yes - never brutally, but often - 7 (6.5%)
  • Yes - occasionally - 21 (19.4%)
  • No - never - 24 (22.2%)
  • emotional abuse - 29 (26.9%)
  • sexual abuse - 12 (11.1%)
  • Total Voters: 68

 Topic: Personal question - were you physically abused as a child?

 (Read 14831 times)
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  • Re: Personal question - were you physically abused as a child?
     Reply #30 - July 03, 2011, 11:50 PM


    But my daughter, she wouldn't dream of rebelling right now, and she is 7, much as I wouldn't ever dream of laying a finger on her.  She isn't that way inclined and yet she is afraid of punishment.  Not physical, although it is implied somewhat since my eldest will actively fight me, so it can get quite crazy, but she is more afraid of the regular goodies being taken away from her, so no tv, no story time, etc etc, its all it takes.  She is a sweetheart <3.  On the other hand my middle son is so rude, always arguing, always challenging, always breaking the rules.




    Your daughter sounds so cute. Grin  dance dance

    Rather be forgotten than remembered for giving in.
  • Re: Personal question - were you physically abused as a child?
     Reply #31 - July 04, 2011, 02:28 AM

    I think you guys are just exaggerating, most of you who lived in western countries while growing up had it good, even if your parents hit you twice or something, you still had school to go to and talk to someone about it, maybe even get the police or whatever

    In Egypt, I was beaten by my mom and in school lol i had no one to go to, like most Egyptians -_-
    I think last time my mom beat me was i was 14, and she tried to beat me with a broom stick then i broke it into half and throw it out of the window. it was her wake up call lol i was already taller than her...

    I was beat every single item that ever existed from vases to shoes to brooms to wires to wax sticks to metal sticks to whips.


    anything you could think off literally lol

    [13:36] <Fimbles> anything above 7 inches
    [13:37] <Fimbles> is wacko
    [13:37] <Fimbles> see
    [13:37] <Fimbles> you think i'd enjoy anything above 7 inches up my arse?
  • Re: Personal question - were you physically abused as a child?
     Reply #32 - July 04, 2011, 04:38 AM

    I think you guys are just exaggerating, most of you who lived in western countries while growing up had it good, even if your parents hit you twice or something, you still had school to go to and talk to someone about it, maybe even get the police or whatever

    In Egypt, I was beaten by my mom and in school lol i had no one to go to, like most Egyptians -_-
    I think last time my mom beat me was i was 14, and she tried to beat me with a broom stick then i broke it into half and throw it out of the window. it was her wake up call lol i was already taller than her...

    I was beat every single item that ever existed from vases to shoes to brooms to wires to wax sticks to metal sticks to whips.


    anything you could think off literally lol


    Wait, wtf Kod?

    You think because I had the school or the police to turn to that it made any difference?

    My parents would beat me until I bled and they still wouldn't stop, they heated up kebab skewers and KNIVES until the metal went red and would burn the soles of our feet, or for my younger sister her soles and the top of her hands which to this day are scarred horrifically.

    I even had to eat baby shit mixed with chilli powder, and then forced into my mouth, then back in my mouth when I puked.

    My parents battered me until I ended up in a 3 month coma, so no, I am not exaggerating. and yeah, maybe getting out at 13 after the coma was where I got lucky and you didn't, but I don't think its right for you to say we are exaggeratin.

    In my world the police and social services would listen sympathetically, and then take me right back home where as soon as the door closed my parents would brutally beat me for not lying to protect them but no one ever intervened and then only because I could have died.

    Inhale the good shit, exhale the bullshit.
  • Re: Personal question - were you physically abused as a child?
     Reply #33 - July 04, 2011, 04:52 AM

    Turnipovich is disappoint.  turnipovich


    Why?  I think it adds to my charm.   Tongue  I am a 'nice' person.

    I don't even remember.. so it must have been nothing huge, to me personally. I've witnessed my parents fight though, and my dad abused my mom right in front of me. Hurt her bad and she was just taking it and I was so little that I couldn't do anything.  Cry

    Another time that stands out was him abusing my sister. She was naked. I'm not going to go into details, it was hard to see because it was so violent (and it was over something so, so stupid) but that stands out in my memory.

    He's always had a really bad temper, but as he grew older he got better I think, just because of age. Although I'm sure when he hears the news of my apostasy that will change.  Roll Eyes

    I can't believe what you've been through, Berbs.  Cry
    hugs


    hugs

    Witnessing abuse is abuse in its own right.  It creates feelings of powerlessness in a child for situations that they can not change and of course feel responsible for even if they aren't.  My son tried to protect me from his dad once and he got hurt in the process, and this made him feel rage for a long time after (infact he still has to deal with it now).  Then when he used to see me being beaten he was scared because he already knew he couldn't protect me.  He would scream in a corner and tried to cover the sounds.

    Actually really tears me up remembering that time, remembering how it made my son feel.  I wish I hadn't put him through that since it does cause emotional disturbances after.  :(

    My eldest witnessed the most abuse, my daughter witnessed none. My middle son saw some, I wonder if this reflects in how settled they feel and content they feel.  My daughter is the most attached to me, and the most settled and happiest of them all. 

    And thanks, she is cute.   dance 

    I need to do something just me and her soon. 

    Inhale the good shit, exhale the bullshit.
  • Re: Personal question - were you physically abused as a child?
     Reply #34 - July 04, 2011, 04:58 AM

    My father is a very abusive man, and he has a bad temper. We used to be scared of him when we are kids. i cant recall how many times i have received beatings from him by using belts,extension cords,horse whip(he once kept one in his room just to use it on us incase if we misbehave) or sometimes he will use his hands.

    Later he became less abusive physically and became more abusive mentally by criticizing you, using a foul mouth and always threathening. My father is the biggest bully i have ever met, as a result i started talking back to him and being rude to him( my younger sister who was the last born and didnt witness all the physical abuse started to hate me because of that but i couldnt care less since she has no idea why am being this way). When he couldnt handle my attitude, he started to depend on my mum to discourage me from being disrespectful, what even pisses me off is that anytime my mum comes and start preaching to me that its haram for one to disobey and disrespect our parents, it drives me crazy, i even once asked her before that how could you defend this man who has been a terror to both of us and you are easily letting get away with things that he is doing to you e.g. He once beats you and you did nothing, he married 3 more women and divorced two, yet you still couldnt do anything. And now you are telling me that i should stop being rude and disrespecting him, no way he can go and rot in hell for all i care and i dont think i can forgive him for what he did.FUCK HIM!!


    Update: i take that phrase "FUCK HIM" back, that was too harsh plus lately he has changed his attitude toward me maybe its because he realized he wouldnt get anywhere by being aggresive with me.

    "I'm standing here like an asshole holding my Charles Dickens"

    "No theory,No ready made system,no book that has ever been written to save the world. i cleave to no system.."-Bakunin
  • Re: Personal question - were you physically abused as a child?
     Reply #35 - July 04, 2011, 05:01 AM

    Wait, wtf Kod?

    You think because I had the school or the police to turn to that it made any difference?

    My parents would beat me until I bled and they still wouldn't stop, they heated up kebab skewers and KNIVES until the metal went red and would burn the soles of our feet, or for my younger sister her soles and the top of her hands which to this day are scarred horrifically.

    I even had to eat baby shit mixed with chilli powder, and then forced into my mouth, then back in my mouth when I puked.

    My parents battered me until I ended up in a 3 month coma, so no, I am not exaggerating. and yeah, maybe getting out at 13 after the coma was where I got lucky and you didn't, but I don't think its right for you to say we are exaggeratin.

    In my world the police and social services would listen sympathetically, and then take me right back home where as soon as the door closed my parents would brutally beat me for not lying to protect them but no one ever intervened and then only because I could have died.



    hence the most of you

    [13:36] <Fimbles> anything above 7 inches
    [13:37] <Fimbles> is wacko
    [13:37] <Fimbles> see
    [13:37] <Fimbles> you think i'd enjoy anything above 7 inches up my arse?
  • Re: Personal question - were you physically abused as a child?
     Reply #36 - July 04, 2011, 05:06 AM

    My father is a very abusive man, and he has a bad temper. We used to be scared of him when we are kids. i cant recall how many times i have received beatings from him by using belts,extension cords,horse whip(he once kept one in his room just to use it on us incase if we misbehave) or sometimes he will use his hands.

    Later he became less abusive physically and became more abusive mentally by criticizing you, using a foul mouth and always threathening. My father is the biggest bully i have ever met, as a result i started talking back to him and being rude to him( my younger sister who was the last born and didnt witness all the physical abuse started to hate me because of that but i couldnt care less since she has no idea why am being this way). When he couldnt handle my attitude, he started to depend on my mum to discourage me from being disrespectful, what even pisses me off is that anytime my mum comes and start preaching to me that its haram for one to disobey and disrespect our parents, it drives me crazy, i even once asked her before that how could you defend this man who has been a terror to both of us and you are easily letting get away with things that he is doing to you e.g. He once beats you and you did nothing, he married 3 more women and divorced two, yet you still couldnt do anything. And now you are telling me that i should stop being rude and disrespecting him, no way he can go and rot in hell for all i care and i dont think i can forgive him for what he did.FUCK HIM!!


    Firstly damn Naija, sounds like some fucked up times for you too.  hugs

    It is as I said, seeing domestic violence is damaging and does make a child angry.  I used to fear that my kids would hate me for leaving their dad, but I realise that was wrong.  They would have hated me more if I had stayed since the angry man......much like your dad.........would still have been in their lives.  I don't blame you for not being able to forgive,  It has taken me a very very long time to finally refuse to give my father and step mother another chance.  I don't talk to them anymore at all.  When I think of them I feel such anger for the things they did, so I don't think of them often.

    Secondly, I have found the same thing for the bolded bit, as my half brothers and sisters were not abused as children.  Although my step mother became psychotic towards them when they finally became teens and started to rebel, up until then, through their childhood, stories of the sisters who had lived there before and were abused, were just that; stories.

    They have told me themselves they just find it hard to believe she did some of the things she did, since she never made them bleed, burned them or any of the other stuff we went through.

    I wouldn't say they are angry at me for being who I am, my brothers and sisters are very westernised, even when they are claiming to be practising muslims.

    Actually, shocking admission here lol when I was a proper believer, I was the MOST hard core muslim in my immediate family, not them.  Grin

    Inhale the good shit, exhale the bullshit.
  • Re: Personal question - were you physically abused as a child?
     Reply #37 - July 04, 2011, 05:08 AM

    hence the most of you


    Well that's ok then. 

    I wonder if it is a North African thing too.  That the 2 brutal votes are from 2 North Africans.  Them North Africans are psycho you know.  Grin

    Inhale the good shit, exhale the bullshit.
  • Re: Personal question - were you physically abused as a child?
     Reply #38 - July 04, 2011, 05:10 AM

    Well that's ok then. 

    I wonder if it is a North African thing too.  That the 2 brutal votes are from 2 North Africans.  Them North Africans are psycho you know.  Grin


    Apparently it is North Africans and Palestinians lol Cheesy maybe we should just change it to south Mediterians

    [13:36] <Fimbles> anything above 7 inches
    [13:37] <Fimbles> is wacko
    [13:37] <Fimbles> see
    [13:37] <Fimbles> you think i'd enjoy anything above 7 inches up my arse?
  • Re: Personal question - were you physically abused as a child?
     Reply #39 - July 04, 2011, 05:13 AM

    Apparently it is North Africans and Palestinians lol Cheesy maybe we should just change it to south Mediterians


    Barbarians and Taliban.  Awesome.   Cheesy Cheesy Cheesy

    Inhale the good shit, exhale the bullshit.
  • Re: Personal question - were you physically abused as a child?
     Reply #40 - July 04, 2011, 05:14 AM

    And I know you are not a barbarian berber per se. but for today you can be part of my club of cool.   Tongue

    Inhale the good shit, exhale the bullshit.
  • Re: Personal question - were you physically abused as a child?
     Reply #41 - July 04, 2011, 05:16 AM

    I will only join your club if you provide the weed and the beer. otherwise i will stick to my Egyptian Mafia  whistling2

    [13:36] <Fimbles> anything above 7 inches
    [13:37] <Fimbles> is wacko
    [13:37] <Fimbles> see
    [13:37] <Fimbles> you think i'd enjoy anything above 7 inches up my arse?
  • Re: Personal question - were you physically abused as a child?
     Reply #42 - July 04, 2011, 05:20 AM

    *Back to hiding in my mind with the rest of the abusive childhood.*
  • Re: Personal question - were you physically abused as a child?
     Reply #43 - July 04, 2011, 05:24 AM

    I will only join your club if you provide the weed and the beer. otherwise i will stick to my Egyptian Mafia  whistling2


    We are North African dude, we must haggle, I provide weed you provide beer. Tongue


    Inhale the good shit, exhale the bullshit.
  • Re: Personal question - were you physically abused as a child?
     Reply #44 - July 04, 2011, 05:24 AM

    I'm under age remember

    [13:36] <Fimbles> anything above 7 inches
    [13:37] <Fimbles> is wacko
    [13:37] <Fimbles> see
    [13:37] <Fimbles> you think i'd enjoy anything above 7 inches up my arse?
  • Re: Personal question - were you physically abused as a child?
     Reply #45 - July 04, 2011, 05:30 AM

    Firstly damn Naija, sounds like some fucked up times for you too.  hugs

    It is as I said, seeing domestic violence is damaging and does make a child angry.  I used to fear that my kids would hate me for leaving their dad, but I realise that was wrong.  They would have hated me more if I had stayed since the angry man......much like your dad.........would still have been in their lives.  I don't blame you for not being able to forgive,  It has taken me a very very long time to finally refuse to give my father and step mother another chance.  I don't talk to them anymore at all.  When I think of them I feel such anger for the things they did, so I don't think of them often.

    Secondly, I have found the same thing for the bolded bit, as my half brothers and sisters were not abused as children.  Although my step mother became psychotic towards them when they finally became teens and started to rebel, up until then, through their childhood, stories of the sisters who had lived there before and were abused, were just that; stories.

    They have told me themselves they just find it hard to believe she did some of the things she did, since she never made them bleed, burned them or any of the other stuff we went through.

    I wouldn't say they are angry at me for being who I am, my brothers and sisters are very westernised, even when they are claiming to be practising muslims.

    Actually, shocking admission here lol when I was a proper believer, I was the MOST hard core muslim in my immediate family, not them.  Grin


    Its alright berbs, just needed to let it out, and the only people that knows about this are my family, most of our relatives and neighbours sees us as one perfect family, infact one of my cousins who is a friend of mine as well once said to me that he wished he grew up in our family Cheesy. In my mind i was like "this guy has no idea of whats going on inside our house." So i only said to him that you should thankful for what you have, its not about having the money and priviledge( because thats the angle he is looking at)

    "I'm standing here like an asshole holding my Charles Dickens"

    "No theory,No ready made system,no book that has ever been written to save the world. i cleave to no system.."-Bakunin
  • Re: Personal question - were you physically abused as a child?
     Reply #46 - July 04, 2011, 05:49 AM

    I went through years of being dismissive over my abuse.

    people would say to me 'I don't understand how you can be so blase about it", but I never really thought they [my parents] were wrong.  I went through a stage of thinking that I should have stayed because the abuse would have at least kept me on the straight and narrow but really that was wrong. 

    It's a bit like confused people joing the army because they think being controlled is the only way to gain self control.  I know you aren't saying that, it just triggered that thought in my head lol.

    It's only really now, the last few years, that I feel so angry about it all.  That I feel betrayed by them, and am able to blame some of my issues on them, whereas before I took full responsiblity for the things that happend to me.

    You know I can see this within my own children, some children are just more prone to anxiety and fear even over implied abuse, than others.  For me, I would rebel like crazy.  I was first brought home by the police at 7 for stealing.  This was something that became a regular thing, but at 7 is when I was introduced to abuse and to islam.  I acted out like children do.

    I knew I would be beaten but I did it anyway, because I knew I would be beaten for something else even if I behaved.  I even remember one time someone saying to me (since everyone knew I was abused because I looked it lol and my parents weren't shy about coming to the school to do it) "but your parents will beat you" and me replying "its only a beating, I can handle it".  (and I could, I could remove myself in my mind when they beat me)

    But my daughter, she wouldn't dream of rebelling right now, and she is 7, much as I wouldn't ever dream of laying a finger on her.  She isn't that way inclined and yet she is afraid of punishment.  Not physical, although it is implied somewhat since my eldest will actively fight me, so it can get quite crazy, but she is more afraid of the regular goodies being taken away from her, so no tv, no story time, etc etc, its all it takes.  She is a sweetheart <3.  On the other hand my middle son is so rude, always arguing, always challenging, always breaking the rules.

    My eldest breaks the rules when he is angry, then NO rule matters. 

    I am rambling cos it seemed relevent somehow, as in not everyone feels the need to provoke their parents so much, but not sure my rambling right now is relevent lol.




    Never knew you had a daughter awwwwww

    "its fashionable to be an ex Muslim these days"
  • Re: Personal question - were you physically abused as a child?
     Reply #47 - July 04, 2011, 05:50 AM

    I had a lot of 'light' beatings, and then the occasional whipping or kicking or tennis racket or other such blood-drawing fun. Then I grew up and started fighting back. By the time my parents realised I wouldn't hesitate to punch them in the face if they touched me again it pretty much stopped.  The threats continue but I just yawn at them these days.


    Why is the thought of you fighting your parents making me giggle.... ahahahaah

    "its fashionable to be an ex Muslim these days"
  • Re: Personal question - were you physically abused as a child?
     Reply #48 - July 04, 2011, 05:56 AM

    I think you guys are just exaggerating, most of you who lived in western countries while growing up had it good, even if your parents hit you twice or something, you still had school to go to and talk to someone about it, maybe even get the police or whatever

    In Egypt, I was beaten by my mom and in school lol i had no one to go to, like most Egyptians -_-
    I think last time my mom beat me was i was 14, and she tried to beat me with a broom stick then i broke it into half and throw it out of the window. it was her wake up call lol i was already taller than her...

    I was beat every single item that ever existed from vases to shoes to brooms to wires to wax sticks to metal sticks to whips.


    anything you could think off literally lol


    I know where your coming from man when I look back on this it makes me laugh especially when you tell white people ahaha they get all shocked and stuff .
    I remember my sister got in trouble in school and my mum was scratching her hands under the table whilst she was talking calmly to the teacher lol . I got beaten with a vacuum cleaner , heals , sticks , belts , wires . I used to just pretend to cry just to give her the satisfaction .

    "its fashionable to be an ex Muslim these days"
  • Re: Personal question - were you physically abused as a child?
     Reply #49 - July 04, 2011, 06:53 AM

    Its probably just my paranoia working up again but damn it stings when you gather the courage to actually post a sensitive issue of the past and it doesn't even gain any recognition.  The fact that my post got completely ignored hurts a lot Cry and I don't know why I'm even saying this here but I just couldn't help myself.  Cry
  • Re: Personal question - were you physically abused as a child?
     Reply #50 - July 04, 2011, 07:20 AM

    Well as it happens I was going to reply but my friend phoned and I didn't want to type out a shitty reply in which there was no real attention.

    I know how it feels, I got annoyed when I poured out the situation about my son in my blog, but I think you (me) just have to keep in mind that people will reply, they just have a lot going on in the real world too.


    Inhale the good shit, exhale the bullshit.
  • Re: Personal question - were you physically abused as a child?
     Reply #51 - July 04, 2011, 07:37 AM

    I know berbsy I know. And that's why I don't hold my paranoia against anyone but myself. Its just the innate yearning us humans have of wanting our pain and our lives to be noticed to make us feel a lil better about ourselves. Just can't help but feel neglected. Cry
  • Re: Personal question - were you physically abused as a child?
     Reply #52 - July 04, 2011, 08:35 AM

    Barbarians and Taliban.  Awesome.   Cheesy Cheesy Cheesy


    Um, why are you associating Palestinians with the Taliban? Not cool.

    "In battle, the well-honed spork is more dangerous than the mightiest sword" -- Sun Tzu
  • Re: Personal question - were you physically abused as a child?
     Reply #53 - July 04, 2011, 09:19 AM

     Cheesy Cheesy Cheesy Cheesy Cheesy Cheesy Cheesy Cheesy

    The blondest of blondest moments. 

    Why did I read that wrong this morning? Cheesy

    Inhale the good shit, exhale the bullshit.
  • Re: Personal question - were you physically abused as a child?
     Reply #54 - July 04, 2011, 01:54 PM

    Battered up at mosque, by the teacher, when I was 11yrs till I drew blood.

    Sexually abused and raped between ages of 10-11yrs.

    Wouldn't wish it on my worst enemy but i've chalked it up to experience, and moved on.
  • Re: Personal question - were you physically abused as a child?
     Reply #55 - July 04, 2011, 03:29 PM

    Battered up at mosque, by the teacher, when I was 11yrs till I drew blood.

    I assume this was because you pronounced something wrong, and something stupid like that.  I have heard this so many times, and they got away & are still getting away with it in countries like Pakistan where religion is based on fear.

    Sexually abused and raped between ages of 10-11yrs

    I cant tell me how sick to the gut this makes me feel - you come across so well balanced, so you have done really well to get out of the mental trauma this would have caused you.

    How did you get through it?  Does it still affect you in a major way now?  

    I hope people who read this and are currently going through this can glean some inspiration from you, and see how you moved on and didnt let it consume every part of you.

    My Book     news002       
    My Blog  pccoffee
  • Re: Personal question - were you physically abused as a child?
     Reply #56 - July 04, 2011, 03:38 PM

    Quote
    I assume this was because you pronounced something wrong, and something stupid like that.  I have heard this so many times, and they got away & are still getting away with it in countries like Pakistan where religion is based on fear


    Unfortunately, this has gone far beyond and has entered the West as well. I remember watching a Dispatches episode about this somewhere in the inner city areas of (East) London. Absolutely revolting and disgraceful.
  • Re: Personal question - were you physically abused as a child?
     Reply #57 - July 04, 2011, 03:40 PM

    Battered up at mosque, by the teacher, when I was 11yrs till I drew blood.

    Sexually abused and raped between ages of 10-11yrs.

    Wouldn't wish it on my worst enemy but i've chalked it up to experience, and moved on.


    far away hug sorry to hear about this Ferrero, i hate when things like that happen, am glad you have gone past that.

    "I'm standing here like an asshole holding my Charles Dickens"

    "No theory,No ready made system,no book that has ever been written to save the world. i cleave to no system.."-Bakunin
  • Re: Personal question - were you physically abused as a child?
     Reply #58 - July 04, 2011, 04:00 PM

    I once threw a water balloon into qurans piled in front of the imam. A crime so great, may I add, that his slaps weren't enough and a thick wooden stick was required.

    At evening, casual flocks of pigeons make
    Ambiguous undulations as they sink,
    Downward to darkness, on extended wings. - Stevens
  • Re: Personal question - were you physically abused as a child?
     Reply #59 - July 04, 2011, 04:01 PM

    Unfortunately, this has gone far beyond and has entered the West as well. I remember watching a Dispatches episode about this somewhere in the inner city areas of (East) London. Absolutely revolting and disgraceful.


    I have watched it to happen in The Hague, Netherlands. Muslim children attending a school had complained to the head master of sexual abuse in the mosque around the corner. The headmaster had tried to complain about that to his school committee, but in vain. Being a doctor, I made a report to my superiors. Not only they did nothing, but it got me into major trouble.

    Religion is organized superstition
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