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Theme Changer

 Topic: Hello and Logitical Question

 (Read 3258 times)
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  • Hello and Logitical Question
     OP - October 25, 2014, 03:35 PM

    Hello everyone, I am officially an ex-Muslim. Do I just 'come out'? Is there an actual place or an official document to assert my new 'non-faith' faith? I've never felt lighter, btw.
  • Hello and Logitical Question
     Reply #1 - October 25, 2014, 04:23 PM

    Hi Sabi80,

    Welcome to CEMB - have a welcome parrot parrot

    You of course have to get "MURTAD" tattooed on your forehead and engage in depraved sex, bacon and booze piggy

    Well, not really...

    Look around at the other introduction posts and tell us something more about yourself. Like have you told your family and friends, how did they react, how was your journey from Islam and so on.

    Welcome again - good to have you here Smiley

    Danish Never-Moose adopted by the kind people on the CEMB-forum
    Ex-Muslim chat (Unaffliated with CEMB). Safari users: Use "#ex-muslims" as the channel name. CEMB chat thread.
  • Hello and Logitical Question
     Reply #2 - October 25, 2014, 05:31 PM

    Welcome.  parrot

    What kind of official document are you imagining, exactly? One where we've all signed our names and addresses? Wink
  • Hello and Logitical Question
     Reply #3 - October 25, 2014, 05:52 PM



    Print this off.

    Write your name in the top line.

    Then below that the words "being an ex-Muslim"

    Then sign and date it.

    Present it at any McDonalds for a free Big Mac.
  • Hello and Logitical Question
     Reply #4 - October 25, 2014, 06:43 PM

    McRib, surely?
  • Hello and Logitical Question
     Reply #5 - October 25, 2014, 06:57 PM

    (Clicky for piccy!)

    Print this off.

    Write your name in the top line.

    Then below that the words "being an ex-Muslim"

    Then sign and date it.

    Present it at any McDonalds for a free Big Mac.



    "Blessed are they who can laugh at themselves, for they shall never cease to be amused."
  • Hello and Logitical Question
     Reply #6 - October 25, 2014, 07:00 PM

    Welcome Sabi80. There's no official roster of Ex-Muslims. If you'd like to, you can share your story here, as others have said. Leaving Islam is about coming to understand that it's just another man-made belief system. There's no paper to sign, no club to join, no rituals to be performed. You are free to do what you want, as long as you don't harm others.

    Hopefully, you see leaving Islam as the beginning of your personal journey towards understanding the world and yourself through a more open mind than Islam taught us. If you can no longer believe or follow Islam, you're an Ex-Muslim; that's all there is to it.

    "Blessed are they who can laugh at themselves, for they shall never cease to be amused."
  • Hello and Logitical Question
     Reply #7 - October 25, 2014, 11:28 PM

    Welcome Sabi80,  Smiley
     parrot bunny
    And nicely put Allat. Afro
  • Hello and Logitical Question
     Reply #8 - October 26, 2014, 01:01 AM

    Drinking alcohol or eating pork is considered the standard rite of passage ritual for those leaving islam  Afro
  • Hello and Logitical Question
     Reply #9 - October 26, 2014, 01:30 AM

    First step is being checked out by the Council of Ex-Muslims. You'll be submitted to a lie detector test to check for taqiyya. If you pass that, you'll be put through a thorough physical and mental evaluation to make sure you are indeed fit to join the soldiers of kaffir. After that you'll be required to sign a contract promising your soul to Iblis. Non muslims and murtads have a number of personal representatives of the shaytan who work with us in the war against allah. Mine is a jinn called Jimmy. Nice lad. Never need to worry about having a light.

    After all this is done Iblis will grant you the powers of a jew, which means, like a born jew, you'll be able to steal the souls of babes, turn water into wine, fly on a broomstick, and of course deny that islam is the one true religion. Though you don't rely on jew magic alone. You will be issued a glock 17, an AK-47, a hell sword (a blade forged in hell's armoury) and a standard swiss army knife. After that, all that's left is getting your first orders.

    Welcome to the dark side. Congratulations on taking your first step to becoming another soldier in the fight against all that is good.

    `But I don't want to go among mad people,' Alice remarked.
     `Oh, you can't help that,' said the Cat: `we're all mad here. I'm mad.  You're mad.'
     `How do you know I'm mad?' said Alice.
     `You must be,' said the Cat, `or you wouldn't have come here.'
  • Hello and Logitical Question
     Reply #10 - October 26, 2014, 04:06 AM

    I put my certificate on the wall but I sold off the guns to the hicks next door and I sweep with the broom, as it doesn't work with the carseats. The jinn we kept and I told the children it was a puppy. It eats bones, right? Same thing, but it doesn't come when called. Might be part Rottweiler. Our contract is filed with all our other legal papers, where we have all our God/Devil soul ownership agreements. Mustn't limit oneself.

    Fantastic idea, Quod. But I really like Abu Ali's certificate, too. So cheerful.

    Welcome, friend! parrot

    Don't let Hitler have the street.
  • Hello and Logitical Question
     Reply #11 - October 26, 2014, 08:23 AM

    Welcome Sabi80, and congratultions on your enlightenment. Smiley

    Our non-faith is indeed one that makes makes us feel less weighed down. However there is one rule that new members must comply with before officially  becoming one of us.

    In order to completely 'let go'of your past, you must divest yourself of all your worldy goods as they were accrued by 'halal' methods.

    I will send you the details of where to send the proceeds once you have sold these 'godly gains'. Just think how much lighter you will feel!

    So glad you joined! I was feeling a bit run-down, like I needed a holiday and then you come along! Perfect timing  Wink


  • Hello and Logitical Question
     Reply #12 - October 26, 2014, 11:18 AM

    In order to completely 'let go'of your past, you must divest yourself of all your worldy goods as they were accrued by 'halal' methods.

    I will send you the details of where to send the proceeds once you have sold these 'godly gains'.

    I can vouch for Mini-me.

  • Hello and Logitical Question
     Reply #13 - October 26, 2014, 12:22 PM

    Welcome to the forum Sabi Smiley

    He's no friend to the friendless
    And he's the mother of grief
    There's only sorrow for tomorrow
    Surely life is too brief
  • Hello and Logitical Question
     Reply #14 - October 26, 2014, 12:24 PM

    Hello everyone, I am officially an ex-Muslim. Do I just 'come out'? Is there an actual place or an official document to assert my new 'non-fath faith? I've never felt lighter, btw.



    All joking aside, Sabi - as Allat said there are no rituals or documents. This is only the beginning of what may well be a very bumpy ride.

    Would you like to tell us a bit more about yourself and your journey so far.

    Smiley
  • Hello and Logitical Question
     Reply #15 - October 27, 2014, 01:34 AM

    Oh wow! lovely words. many thanks. great humour too!  thnkyu
    I will defo go to the Intro section and share my experience with you all.
    Have a great day!
  • Hello and Logitical Question
     Reply #16 - November 19, 2014, 11:39 AM

    You haven't joined a club, you've left one!

    Welcome to the forums!
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