New member from birmingham

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- Sab90
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New member from birmingham
OP - March 11, 2014, 10:32 AM

Hello everyone, I'm Sab 23 from Birmingham.

I don't really know where to begin, so let's start from the beginning!

I've was raised within a fairly strict Muslim household and practiced Islam, when I turned about 18 I came to the realisation that everything I was taught, told and made to believe regarding Islam was primarily cultured based, with no real religious quranic meaning or back up. So, from birth Islam was drilled into me. Ive classed myself as agnostic for the last few years and announced this to my family 6 months ago. Obviously, they didn't take it well, but my parents and siblings stated that they "expected" this as I was always so distant from religion. Between the ages of 8-12ish I attended mosque, where I stood out like a sore thumb, thus an easy target for the fellow female bullies who classed themselves as devout Muslims.

However, the bullying ended and my faith eroded completely when I studied sociology and phycology at university and began to search deeply into Islam, through my research I began to view Islam for what it really is and how dark and sinister it actually is. The things I was taught in mosque were often so terrifying that I was unable to sleep for days out of sheer terror.

So, I was searching the web to see if there was anyone else like me out there, and I came across this site. I have been regularly viewing this site just to see what was going on, and it's safe to say I'm so surprised at the number of ex-Muslims! It may sound insane but for a long time, i thought it was alone!

One factor of Islam, or any religion for that matter is the way in which we are taught to believe things and it's frowned upon to question them. Whenever I engage in friendly debates with my Muslim friends they simply end most debates with "well that's what I was told in mosque so it's gotta be true, ennit." And I always say Do Your Own Research! Your a person, not a lemming/sheep/minion!

I hope you all welcome me to this forum as I have read through a few threads, very intriguing!

One thing I have always believed, and told myself is that being moral, polite, honest and maintaining appropriate etiquette is more important then anything else. I have not become an ex-Muslim to drink and dress provocatively, I don't drink nor do I dress in a risqué manner, I "dropped" my faith as I did my own research and realized, this isn't me.

This is the first time I have ever expressed myself regarding my religion in a written form, feels like a massive weight had been shifted

"Having a war about religion is like having a fight over who's got the best imaginary friend" - Yasser Arafat

"You can be as good as the best of them, or as bad as the worst." BS
- Quod Sum Eris
- King of the
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Reply #1 - March 11, 2014, 10:47 AM

Welcome Sab, always nice to have another Brit. Have a parrot.

`But I don't want to go among mad people,' Alice remarked.
`Oh, you can't help that,' said the Cat: `we're all mad here. I'm mad. You're mad.'
`How do you know I'm mad?' said Alice.
`You must be,' said the Cat, `or you wouldn't have come here.'
- Rubaya
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Reply #2 - March 11, 2014, 10:49 AM

Welcome Sab. Here, have a cute dancing rabbit- . Some people prefer to stay deaf and blind as the Quran says. But they are not the kafirs, but the Muslims. I research stuff on the Net about the problems of Islam and tell my parents and one of my close friends about it. They seem to agree but still cling to their faith.
- billy
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Reply #3 - March 11, 2014, 11:33 AM

Great to have you here Sab

"we can smell traitors and country haters"

Quote from: arX on May 01, 2011, 03:33 AM
God is Love.
Love is Blind. Stevie Wonder is blind. Therefore, Stevie Wonder is God.
- Sab90
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Reply #4 - March 11, 2014, 06:58 PM

Thank you it's great to be here

Wish you all a lovely evening

"You can be as good as the best of them, or as bad as the worst." BS
- Qtian
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Reply #5 - March 11, 2014, 08:03 PM

Hello Sab, it's nice to meet you. I started to renounce Islam at the same age as you too (If that matters at all). Please enjoy your parrot.

My mind runs, I can never catch it even if I get a head start.
- Sab90
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Reply #6 - March 11, 2014, 10:48 PM

Hiya, nice to meet you too

I found it quite difficult to get to grips with it in my early teens, a confusing time for most in general! But through the power of literature I managed to make it out and see the light.

Thanks for the parrot too, very much appreciated

"You can be as good as the best of them, or as bad as the worst." BS
- FinalForesight
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Reply #7 - March 12, 2014, 02:26 PM

Hello Sab, welcome to the forum
You should be proud as you've managed to announce your agnosticism to your family which is a big step
- Sab90
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Reply #8 - March 12, 2014, 08:47 PM

Yeah it was a massive step for me it got to a point were I couldn't carry on with the lies, as I felt worse lying to my parents. They obviously wern't happy about it, for a while they thought it was possibly a phase until I showed my literature to back up my choice.

Glad I made it out, without too much fuss!

"You can be as good as the best of them, or as bad as the worst." BS
- FinalForesight
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Reply #9 - March 12, 2014, 09:18 PM

What literature is this? I'm studying or at least meant to be. I can imagine the local community not being too happy, depending on where you live of course. I understand your point about lying to your parents but in a lot of cases the truth is too much to handle.
- Sab90
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Reply #10 - March 12, 2014, 10:09 PM

There was a few different forms of sources I used, mainly showing my parents the Islamic books we grew up with and explaining the many contradictions, especially in the books designed for children and how they dramatically change as the audience reading those books get older and move on to further age appropriate books. I also explained how I felt, for my dad that was enough, he's a very kind man. My mother on the other hand was incredibly angry.

I live in a predominantly non-Muslim area so the local community isn't a problem for me, however most of my relatives and extended family members don't know yet, my parents don't know how to explain it to people, I suppose they don't want to be gossiped about, and be seen as bad parents or failures.

"You can be as good as the best of them, or as bad as the worst." BS
- FinalForesight
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Reply #11 - March 12, 2014, 10:23 PM

Lucky you. The extended family/community issue is one of those things, it just nags you on the side and once in a while rears its ugly head and could potentially make things awkward. This is especially the case with certain cultures such as some African and Asian ones.
- Sab90
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Reply #12 - March 12, 2014, 10:55 PM

Yeah I totally agree, very often in families and within the community the family's pride out rules ones happiness and comfort. But it's also important to remain true to yourself

Have you announced to your family yet? If so how did they take it?

"You can be as good as the best of them, or as bad as the worst." BS
- FinalForesight
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Reply #13 - March 12, 2014, 11:13 PM

To be honest that never really bothered me, as long as one is polite and respectful relations should be kept civil. What someone believes is noone elses business, they shouldn't attempt to impose themselves on others. Obviously in reality the opposite is true unfortunately. No, I have yet to, because I do not wish to cause immense grief. Sometimes I imagine it though, like a forbidden dream of sorts.
- Sab90
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Reply #14 - March 13, 2014, 09:37 PM

I agree with you completely, it is incredibly difficult to explain to family members as it can cause a lot of heartache. I always thought is never find the right moment to announce it but found that there never really is a "right" moment for something like this, sometimes it's just better to dive straight into the deep end

"You can be as good as the best of them, or as bad as the worst." BS
- TheDashingRabbit
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Reply #15 - March 14, 2014, 03:28 AM

Welcome !

Have a parrot

In my opinion a life without curiosity is not a life worth living
- Sab90
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Reply #16 - March 14, 2014, 10:58 AM

Thank you

"You can be as good as the best of them, or as bad as the worst." BS
- Qtian
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Reply #17 - March 14, 2014, 10:21 PM

My mind runs, I can never catch it even if I get a head start.
- serpentofeden
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Reply #18 - March 14, 2014, 11:59 PM

Congrats ! Fear not there's many like yourself
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